Centre for Fathering was founded on Father’s Day 25 years ago. This interview, which captures the heart and vision of CFF’s founding, was conducted by Kevin Foo of Brainy Foo Wordsmith, who is also the author of the Graciousness Series

Fatherhood is one of the most powerful forces in shaping the lives of children, yet for decades, it remained an overlooked conversation in Singapore. In 2000, three men—Edwin Choy, Wong Suen Kwong (Suen), and Raymond Koh—recognised a critical gap in family life: fathers were largely absent, not just physically, but emotionally. 

“If you went to a playground back then, it was rare to see a father playing with his children,” Edwin recalled. Raised by an alcoholic father, he had vowed to break the cycle. Yet, as a young father himself, deeply immersed in full-time church ministry, he found that despite his best intentions, he was drifting away from his own children. The realisation hit hard—being a good father required more than love; it demanded action. 

A Defining Moment 

That moment of reckoning led Edwin to pursue graduate studies in the U.S., where he enrolled in a course led by fathering expert Dr. Ken Canfield. The experience was transformational. For the first time, Edwin saw fatherhood not as an instinct but as a learned role—one that required conscious effort, intentionality, and presence. 

“I realised that some of the things my own father did, I was unknowingly repeating,” he admitted. Determined to change, he redefined his role as a father and sought to bring this knowledge back to Singapore. 

Fate intervened when he reconnected with Suen, who was studying counselling in a nearby city. Sharing his newfound insights, Edwin found a kindred spirit in Suen, and together, they made a bold decision: they would train under Dr. Canfield and bring a fathering movement home. With newfound conviction, they secured resources, expertise, and even the rights to republish Canfield’s books for Singaporean fathers. 

From Idea to Impact: Building a Movement 

Bringing their vision to life was no small feat. The early days of Centre for Fathering (CFF) were a test of perseverance. Their first office—a modest space above a prata shop along Upper Thomson Road—became the headquarters where they juggled programme development, community outreach, and financial sustainability. 

A breakthrough came when the Ministry of Community Development (MCD) recognised the urgency of their mission. With government support, CFF began its first efforts where fatherhood begins—the maternity ward where they conducted monthly talks for expectant fathers, guiding them in their new roles from day one. 

But one of their most enduring initiatives was inspired by something seemingly simple—family meals. Dr. William Doherty’s research in the U.S. had found that teenagers who regularly eat with their families were far less likely to engage in substance abuse. This insight led to the birth of Eat With Your Family Day, a campaign that took Singapore by storm. Years later, when the Ministry of Community Development, Youth and Sports (MCYS) conducted a public survey on the most memorable social campaigns, Eat With Your Family Day came up in the lead, a testament to its cultural significance.  

Expanding the Footprint: A National Movement 

From humble beginnings, CFF’s impact deepened and expanded. In 2009, the launch of DADs for Life—a national fathering movement in partnership with MCYS—propelled active fatherhood into mainstream conversation. Today, that movement has grown to include MUMs for Life, Bapa Sepanjang Hayat, Ibu Sepanjang Hayat, and Appa Valnaal Uravu, reflecting the diverse communities that make up Singapore’s social fabric. 

Beyond parenting workshops, CFF has reached workplaces, schools, community groups, and even prisons—helping rebuild family bonds in some of the most challenging circumstances. Their ICAN Fathering Workshop has equipped countless fathers with practical skills, and initiatives such as Back to School with Dad and  Adventure With Dad  have fostered deeper parent-child connections. 

Looking Ahead: A Legacy in Motion 

As CFF celebrates its 25th anniversary in 2025, Edwin reflects on the movement’s journey. Though he has stepped back from the frontlines, his passion remains. “The organisation is in the hands of younger fathers with bigger dreams, stronger networks, and fresh perspectives,” he shares. “If I can contribute in any small way, I’d love to support their vision.” 

For Edwin, fatherhood has come full circle. His children, now adults, were raised by a father who made the conscious choice to be present—to lead not just with words, but with actions. The movement he helped pioneer continues to evolve, but its mission remains unchanged: to equip, encourage, and empower fathers to be the unwavering anchor in their children’s lives. 

Now, 25 years after CFF’s founding, we had the privilege of sitting down for an intimate and inspiring conversation with Edwin Choy—one of the visionaries behind the movement. In a fitting tribute to this milestone, we asked him 25 questions, each reflecting his journey at CFF and the lessons learned along the way. Through his reflections, he shared the challenges overcome, the impact made, and his hopes for the future. Here’s what he revealed. 

The Vision That Started It All 

1. What inspired you to start CFF, and what personal experiences shaped your conviction that Singapore needed a fathering movement? 

I grew up in a home where my father was an alcoholic, and I constantly found myself reflecting on why my family was different—why my father wasn’t like other dads. That shaped my desire, from my teenage years, to do things differently when I became a father. 

Years later, I attended Dr. Ken Canfield’s workshop in the U.S., and that experience was a turning point. The workshop was filled with participants from different nationalities, yet all of us shared the same longing—the need for an engaged father. That was when I realised that fatherhood struggles weren’t just an American or cultural issue—it was universal. That conviction led me to establish CFF when I returned to Singapore. 

2. When you first set out to establish CFF, what were your biggest hopes and goals for it? 

Our goal was simple: to make fatherhood more intentional for Singaporean dads. There wasn’t an existing framework or strong public conversation about involved fatherhood, but we believed deeply that fathers needed to step up and be present in their families. 

3. What were the key challenges in getting CFF off the ground, and how did you overcome them? 

The biggest challenge was funding. We had a few friends donate some money, and there were some matching grants, but even then, we couldn’t pay our first full-time staff on time. We owed him months of salary. 

Another challenge was raising awareness. No one was talking about involved fatherhood at the time. Fathers themselves questioned why we were advocating for this when traditionally, parenting was seen as the mother’s domain. It took three years of perseverance before we gained traction, and by the fifth year, we had a board in place and a more stable structure. 

4. Was there a defining moment when you realised CFF was making a real impact? 

Within the first two years, we knew we were making a difference. The media picked up on our work, we were constantly interviewed, and feedback started pouring in. It was clear that the conversation on fatherhood was gaining momentum. 

5. Were there moments in CFF’s journey when you doubted whether the movement would succeed? How did you push through those challenges? 

I never doubted the mission, but I did question whether we could sustain the organisation long-term. The financial struggle was real, and if we had the funding earlier, we could have done so much more. But despite the limitations, our passion kept us going—we were always eager to try new things and push boundaries. 

CFF’s Early Years & Pioneering Fatherhood Programmes 

6. What were some of the first programmes and initiatives launched by CFF? And what was their impact? 

The ICAN Fathering Workshop  was our very first training programme, and we introduced in schools and hospitals. Then, we started running  pre-natal fathering sessions for expectant dads in hospitals. The programme was so successful that years later, some of those fathers attended our father-child bonding events at schools, still remembering what they had learned from us. 

7. How did you engage fathers in the early years, especially when fatherhood wasn’t a mainstream social focus? 

It was challenging because we weren’t marketing experts—we were just passionate individuals driven by conviction. We relied heavily on word of mouth, and we approached organisations that already had captive audiences. Schools were more receptive, and government ministries were supportive because we were a non-profit. 

8. Can you share a memorable story of a father whose life was transformed by CFF? 

One of the most touching stories is about a father—let’s call him Hardy—who attended our prison programme. I had developed a 12-week solution-focused training programme for incarcerated fathers, and Hardy was part of the first batch. 

He was in prison for getting into a fight while protecting someone he cared for. But during his sentence, he had a realisation—his time in prison was robbing him of precious moments with his children. He made a commitment to be fully present as a father after his release. 

After his release, Hardy reached out to me to share something incredible—every night, he would hold his teenage children’s hands as they walked out for dinner, and at night, he would tell them stories. This is something we typically associate with young children, not teenagers. His actions spoke volumes about the deep connection he was rebuilding. 

Not only that, he later started his own renovation business and made it his mission to hire other ex-offenders to help them reintegrate into society. That was a life-changing transformation, and to this day, it reminds me why this work is so meaningful. 

9. How did you navigate resistance or skepticism about the movement in the beginning? 

Some people told us we were ahead of our time, that Singaporean fathers weren’t ready for this. Others questioned why we were focusing on fathers and not including mothers. Some mothers even felt left out. I’m glad we didn’t listen to the naysayers. We pressed on, and today, CFF is proof that fathers stepping up makes a difference. 

10. What role has CFF played in shaping national conversations around fatherhood in Singapore? 

I think we were the first and only voice advocating paternal involvement in parenting at the time. We spoke about it in the media, on talk shows, and in schools. I remember a moment on a radio talk show when a woman, whose father left the family when she was five, called in and, through tears, said, “Please continue what you’re doing. Fathers need this.” That encouragement meant the world to us. We were no longer just a small movement—we had become a national conversation. 

Growth & Impact Over 25 Years 

11. Over the years, how has the relationship between CFF and DADs for Life evolved? What drove this collaboration? 

From the start, we knew that CFF could not stand alone—the movement needed to grow beyond us. When Jason Wong founded Dads for Life, he approached us to collaborate, and it was a natural partnership.  Dads for Life was a national movement with a strong public engagement and outreach arm, while CFF had structured programs designed to equip fathers. Together, we became complementary forces—one raising awareness, the other providing the tools and support. Neither would be complete without the other. 

12. Which initiatives, such as Eat With Your Family Day or Back to School with Dad, do you feel have had the greatest impact? Why? 

While Eat With Your Family Day has been fantastic for raising public awareness, the initiatives that have created the deepest impact are the ICAN Fathering Workshop and Father-Child Bonding Camps. 

These programmes go beyond just spreading awareness; they create deep emotional connections. One of the most moving moments in the Father-Child Bonding workshop is when fathers—many for the first time—verbalise their love for their children or embrace them in a heartfelt hug. This simple but profound act has brought fathers and children closer in ways they never imagined. 

13. How has CFF’s work extended beyond families to influence schools, communities, and even prisons? 

Our school engagement is incredibly strong—we currently have a presence in over 100 schools, building a network of fathers who actively participate in their children’s education. The demand for our school-based programs far exceeds our trainers’ capacity, showing just how much fathers want to be involved. 

Our prison work has also seen significant outcomes. So much so that, after eight years, the prison authorities requested that we expand our program to reach more incarcerated fathers across multiple prison blocks. The impact of fathering is needed in every corner of society. 

14. Looking back over the past 25 years, what is one defining moment in your journey with CFF that you will always cherish? 

One of the most fulfilling moments for me has been seeing our initiatives gain national traction—for example, the Back to School with Dad campaign. It was incredibly encouraging to see the public embrace it—particularly when a company in Singapore allowed one of its staff to return to Malaysia to have a meal with his family in Kuala Lumpur—along with companies giving employees time to be present for their children’s first day of school. Seeing fatherhood prioritised at a societal level has been deeply rewarding. 

15. Fatherhood has changed significantly over the past two decades. What do you think is the biggest mindset shift among fathers today compared to when CFF first started? 

When we first started, many fathers didn’t see themselves as primary caregivers. Parenting was traditionally considered a mother’s role. 

Now, I see fathers fully embracing their nurturing role. They are no longer afraid to be seen carrying their babies in public, feeding them on the train, or actively playing with their children at the playground. Just two decades ago, it was more common to see domestic helpers taking children out while fathers worked. This mindset shift is one of the most encouraging signs of progress. 

Fathering in the Modern World 

16. What do you see as the biggest challenges modern fathers face today, and how should CFF address them? 

The biggest challenge I hear from parents today is time. With both fathers and mothers working, finding time for children is a struggle. At CFF, we emphasise that time is invested in what we value. If fathers truly understand how their presence shapes their children, they will prioritise making time, even in busy schedules. 

17. With the rise of digital distractions and social media, how do you think modern fathers can stay engaged with their children while balancing work and technology? 

I won’t claim to be an expert in this area, but I firmly believe parents are the most powerful role models. If we are constantly glued to our screens, we can’t expect our children to behave any differently. If we want our kids to disconnect from devices, we need to show them the value of meaningful, offline engagement. We must create alternative ways to connect—shared activities, conversations, and traditions that build family bonds. 

18. How do you see the role of fathers at Centre For Fathering evolving in the next 10 to 20 years? 

I think my personal vision matters less than the vision of the current generation leading CFF. The team today is young, dynamic, and in touch with the evolving needs of modern fathers. Their leadership and vision will shape the next chapter of fatherhood advocacy. 

19. What advice would you give to fathers who feel overwhelmed by the pressures of work, parenting, and personal commitments? 

Many fathers see parenting as another responsibility stacked onto work pressures. But fatherhood should be a source of joy—something that fuels and sustains us, not drains us. The key isn’t just about work-life balance, but about integration—understanding that being present for our children is not a burden, but a privilege. 

20. If you could send one message to all fathers today, what would it be? 

The greatest impact a man can have is as a father, whose influence shapes not just his children but generations to come. Fatherhood goes beyond raising kids—it’s about leaving a lasting legacy. Never underestimate the power of your presence. 

Personal Reflections & Leadership 

21. What has this journey meant to you on a personal level? 

For 25 years, nothing has sustained my passion more than seeing fathers grow into their roles. Helping fathers step up, embrace their journey, and make a difference has been the most fulfilling work of my life. 

22. How has CFF shaped your own role as a father, and what have you learned along the way? 

My own children have kept me accountable! They often joke, “Dad, you’re the founder of CFF—better live up to it!” In a way, their playful reminders have been guiding markers for me as I navigated fatherhood. Through the years, I’ve learned to gradually let go—to give them autonomy and recognise that parenting evolves as they grow. Now that they are adults, I cherish the mutual learning and bond between us. 

23. What has been the most rewarding moment for you as a leader in this movement? 

Seeing a new generation of leaders take the vision forward. CFF is now led by incredibly talented individuals who are younger fathers, taking fathering in Singapore to a new level. I now focus my volunteer time on spreading fathering outside Singapore, and it has reached at least twelve Asian countries. Watching this movement expand is incredibly fulfilling. 

24. If you could go back to when you first started CFF, what advice would you give to your younger self? 

I wouldn’t change much—except I would start with greater conviction. Back then, I worried about funding, about sustainability. Looking back, I’d tell myself: Press on. Stay focused. The impact will come. 

25. If you could give one lasting piece of advice to fathers reading this interview—something that will still hold true 25 years from now—what would it be? 

Never underestimate the power of your fathering. The benefits of raising a well-adjusted, loving family are worth more than gold. Your role shapes the future—not just for your children, but for generations to come. 

Final Thoughts 

Edwin Choy’s journey has been one of faith, perseverance, and deep conviction. His impact on fatherhood in Singapore is undeniable, and his legacy continues to shape families for the better.  As we look to the future, his words serve as a timeless reminder—fathers matter, and their presence leaves an indelible mark.